- the jumpsuit is from houseofcb
- shoes from christianlouboutin
Don’t forget to smile!
Author: lamalienne
A Malian woman in the US, becoming what she only dreamt of.
Hair removal
As women, we always want to get rid of our body hair, but it’s not always an easy task. Some women don’t have lots of hair, so they don’t worry about things like facial hair. however if like me, you have hair everywhere. this post is for you.
- For my facial hair, I love to go threading. Yes, it’s painful, but it lasts for a long time, also the more you thread the less the hair reappears. I also love how my eyebrows look. I only clean my eyebrows, because I’m not into thin eyebrows.
- For the rest of my body, I do sugaring. I personally don’t like waxing, because of some bad experiences. Sugaring is less painful, it pulls the entire hair out, and if you know me, you know I’m all about natural things, sugaring in 100% natural.
Enjoy my hairy friends!
My Moisturizers
In one of my posts, I talked about products I use for my oily face. Now let’s talk about the products I use every day. I have eczema and I live in the midwest, which means winters are rough. However we all know eczema doesn’t care if it’s summer or winter, you need to keep your body moisturized. yes, my friends moisturize, moisturize and moisturize.
- I loveeeee Kiehls cream de corps, I actually love a lot of things from them, but cream de corps is something I keep going back to. My skin loves it.
- My face loves la Mer moisturizing soft cream. A lot of people complain about the price, which is a little much, but you do get what you pay for.
- I add a little bit of bio-oil to my cream de corps. Don’t ask me why I just love how it feels on my skin. Bio oil by itself is great, just like cream de corps by itself is also great.
- Lush’s Tea tree water, is something I can’t live without, Yes I have made that decision. This toner is amazing, it really helps with oil control. I spray it on my face everyday as much as needed.
- Last but not least, is the Caudalie beauty elixir. It refreshes and gives you that I’m awake feeling. I usually use it after my night time routine. It has oil in it and since I have an oily face, I don’t like using it during the day. However, I will still spray it if I need to moisturize while on the go. I keep on in my purse.
Stay moisturized, and be kind!
What’s in my salad?
My husband and I try our best to practice healthy eating. We also try to make what we eat fun. For example, our salads are always colorful and fun.
So what’s in this salad?
- Green leaf salad
- Tomatoes
- Avocados
- Mango
- Mini peppers
- Onions
- Dry cranberries
- Strawberries
- Almonds
We make it with a vinaigrette made in-house. I will be posting about that in my next blog post. Stay tuned!
Enjoy and don’t forget to smile!
My 4C hair oil treatment
Now if you have 4C hair you know how hard it is to keep it soft and manageable. A trip to the hair salon is no help because they use the products that they have available on everyone. For as long as I can remember I used a relaxer on my hair because I thought that was the only way to manage it. After giving birth to my daughter, I started caring for her hair and reading a lot about our hair. It then hit me, if I could take care of my daughter’s natural hair, and manage it, why was I still using a relaxer?
I decided to cut my hair in June 2018 and just let it grow naturally, without using chemicals.
Here are the steps on how I keep my hair soft: (I do this once every two weeks).
- invest in a steamer
- Rinse your hair with apple cider vinegar (2/4 cider in one cup of water)
- Rinse the cider with lukewarm water, and remove all the cider out of the hair.
- In a bowl, mix Chebe powder, coconut oil, avocado oil, a few drops of peppermint oil and castor oil together. It should look like the picture below.
- Apply the mixture on your wet hair and use the steamer for 10mins
- shampoo your hair and condition your hair. use the long tooth comb while conditioning to get rid of the excess Chebe (yes some grains might stay in your hair)
Don’t forget to be KIND.
With love, Fatou
Itchy scalp solutions
Itchy scalp, now if you have it, you know how annoying it can be. Here are the products I use for mine.
- Aloe vera gel is bae I use it as a styling gel, I sometimes use it on my skin, but mainly it helps with the itch. you can purchase it on majestic pure
- Apple cider is even more bae, I pour some in the plastic bottle and rinse my hair with it before shampooing. It takes the itch right away. I purchase mine at trader joe’s, but you can get it almost everywhere. One place would be GNC
- I use peppermint while conditioning, I love the sensation it lives on my scalp. I also purchase my peppermint oil at whole foods, but you can get it almost everywhere too, just make sure its good quality.
Say goodbye to itchy scalp!
My Take on breastfeeding
When I was growing up, everyone breastfed their babies, it was something natural until women were introduced to formula. Formula was expensive, it required a bottle, your baby didn’t have to be stuck to you the whole day, you could go do whatever you wanted, and you didn’t have to bring your baby with you. Women didn’t have to worry about cracked, sore, bleeding nipples or milk blisters. Also, women found it cool, to have their baby fed formula because remember only the wealthy could afford it. Women were also told that if they didn’t breastfeed, their breast would stay perky, what woman doesn’t want perky breast.
We are now in 2018 and mothers in the US are being told to consider breastfeeding their children, while women in Africa are stopping to breastfeed. I understand some women can’t breastfeed because of health issues, because they can’t produce milk, and those women have no choice but to feed their children formula. Here in the US, there are breast milk banks, where women with extra breastmilk donate it. When my daughter was born, I breastfed her exclusively for six months. I didn’t even give her water. When she was six months, I introduced food to her, but I continued breastfeeding until she was two years old. I developed sores, blisters, and cracked nipples. I would cry at times, but I never gave up, because I was determined. My right nipple never healed properly. I was judged when I fed her in public, I was judged because I didn’t stop breastfeeding after six months or after she turned one. I took some time off, but I bought a breast pump for when I needed to pump. Pumps aren’t only useful for pumping milk for baby when you have to leave her behind, they are also helpful for when your breast are full of milk, and you don’t want to develop sores.
Here are some reasons why a baby should be breastfed:
- When you give birth, the first milk that you produce is called colostrum, it’s rich in nutrients, it’s an antibacterial and immune system booster. theses things aren’t found in formula.
- Breast milk has natural antibodies that will help your baby with ear infections and such. My daughter has had three ear infections since she was born, she’s three now.
- Breast milk can help decrease the risk of sudden infant death syndrome in the babies first year of being born.
- Breast milk is digested easily, which reduces constipation and gas. I don’t remember my daughter ever being constipated when she was breastfed.
- Some studies show that breastfeeding could make your child more intelligent. My daughter started counting to ten when she was nine months, by eighteen months she was counting to ten in both English and French, she knew all her colors and shapes. At two she started reading three-letter words.
- Breastfed children have a lower risk of being overweight, having diabetes, developing asthma, etc…
- Breastfeeding is also beneficial for women, it helps with weight loss. I can attest to this because I lost all the weight I gained during pregnancy and more. It may also help reduce the risk of having diabetes, heart disease, etc…
This blog post was not written to judge those that decide to not breastfeed.
Let’s learn from each other!
My oily face solutions
For so long I have been trying to find products (that are organic) and solutions that I can use at home, to get my oily face in control. Here are the products and tools I use.
- I start with the black head/white head remover. I love this tool, especially for my nose. It sucks all the dirt out. I like the big head cup more than the others, and I use it on high. I steam my face first before using it, that way I get better results. I do this every two weeks, or as needed. You can purchase it on Amazon
- I use the dead sea mud mask, which I leave on for about 15 mins. All I can say about this mask is that I love it. I try to do this once a week. You can also purchase on Amazon
- I use the scrub after I clean off the mask. I love doing this because the scrub is gentle, but exfoliates enough. It’s not rough on my skin. Every week, I also use this scrub to exfoliate my whole body. I purchase this at whole foods, but you can get it online at Apothecaries
- I know a lot of you are wondering why does she have bio oil, just because our face is oily doesn’t mean we don’t need to moisturize it. Bio oil is excellent because a little goes a long way. I just dab a small amount on my cheeks, chin, and forehead. I use bio oil every night after my bath or shower. I will post about the products used during the day in another post. I like the big bottle because you get more for your buck. I purchased mine at Walgreens or CVS.
- I spray the tea tree water, which is one of my favorites as well. This I use every day, morning, midday, night, whenever needed. It can also be used as a setting spray. I purchase it from Lush
- Last but not least, I use the face massage tool, to get everything in my pores. I bought a cheap one because I didn’t want to spend a lot of money on it, without being sure if I liked it. I purchased it on Amazon
What I wore today
The shaming of the girlchild has to stop
If you were raised in an Africa household, then you have been or are being shamed for one thing or another.
When you are a twelve-year-old girl and can’t make a decent pot of rice, or couscous, or whatever your family eats the most, your own mother will shame you with words like “how do you expect to find a husband if you can’t even cook.” Why can’t we teach our daughters to cook for their own feeding, and not for a man?
In Mali were I was raised, boys are not allowed to go into the kitchen, it’s a taboo. A kitchen is a woman’s place, boys don’t clean, cleaning is for girls. My questions are don’t boys need to eat, don’t boys need to be in a clean environment. What makes them better than girls. I think we should teach both girls and boys to cook and clean.
Then you reach 18, and no man has shown interest in you, your aunties start shaming you for not having a suitor. If your answer is “I’m still in school,” they say you can be in school and have a husband. Yes, it might be true that we can be in school and have a husband. I’m 30 and still in school with a husband and child. However, I think we are not mature enough to manage both at 18. I think we should encourage young girls to focus more on their studies, and a husband will come later.
Then you reach 25, and you are not married, you will be shamed for being too old and not having a husband. You will be reminded of how a woman can only have children at a certain age. How about we let women take their time and decide to get married when they feel comfortable and when they find the right partner.
When you finally get married and wait to have children, you will be shamed for not wanting to give birth. Now there are a lot of women who can’t have children, just like there are men who can’t get a woman pregnant. However, only the woman is a fault. Its time we let that friend, sister, and cousin who is suffering for not having a child know that it might not be her, that she and her husband need to go do some tests and that there are solutions it.
When you have a child and take time before having another one, you will be shamed. No one bothers to sit and think about the reasons you might not be having another child. There are so many reasons women decide to take their time before having another child, it could be you are not ready mentally, financially or physically, because we all know childbirth takes a toll on us. It could be you just don’t want to have more children.
As a woman and a mother, I think we should teach our children to cook because they need to feed themselves first. We should teach our children that having a diplomat is their first husband. After their diplomat, they should try to secure a job, so that they don’t ever have to depend on anyone. After they are married, they should have children when they want to, not when others want them to. It’s their body, and they are the ones that will take care of the child. Having a child is not an easy task and shouldn’t be done out of pressure.
We should remind our children, that this is their life, they should think about themselves before they do anything. Everyone telling them to do this and that has their own life to live, they shouldn’t let them live theirs as well. They should stand up and be in control of their lives.
La Malienne 